Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Balls.


Hello everyone. 
            Today I’d like to talk about balls.
            That’s right, this week it’s all about balls.
            Balls of all shapes, sizes, textures, and consistencies.  Come along; we’re going on a journey together.  Bring beers.   

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

The Bridge

“The next time a guy wants to date you, you should bring him here.  If he can’t navigate this menu, it’s a clear sign he’s not right for you.”
“Excuse me?  The next time a guy wants to date me, he’ll be the one bringing me here, not the other way around.  Cuz those days are long gone.” 
“You know what I meant; this cheese page is a good test to see whether or not someone can keep up with you food-wise.  And I know that’s important to you.”
He’s right, as he usually is.  Hence the reason I call him my Spirit Guide.  I can’t quite manage to bite back my retort, but I quietly mutter it under my breath.  We are in our fancy goin’-out clothes, after all—I have to at least try show a little class—because despite what you’ve heard, this knife-wielding tomboy cleans up pretty well and rocks a maxi dress like it’s nobody’s business. 
Sam ignores my comment although he hears every syllable, says instead, “If I’m not mistaken, I am a boy and you are a girl, and aren’t you taking me out at this very moment, or did I read your email wrong?”
“This is different.  We’re friends.  And it’s your birthday.”  His forty-first birthday, to be exact, though you’d never know it to look at him.